Boundaries - Ann

It was nice to be able to have lunch together today! : )

So now for the chapter! I found it to be a quick read, and to be honest I think Mary goes a little far in some of the things she says in this chapter. My first thoughts were, wow Mary is kinda crazy!

In the beginning of the chapter she went through the examples of women who had messed up their lives, all with differing circumstances and it seemed like she was saying " if you put yourself in this situation you will do this, or this horrible thing will happen to you.....which I think is not always the case.....It just seemed kind of extreme.

Nevertheless, I very much agree with Mary and how we need to have healthy boundaries and to build a protective hedge, in order to safeguard ourselves, however I will honestly say I have not taken it to the level that Mary presents in this chapter nor do I think about it on a daily basis as perhaps I can in the future. Proverbs 14:16 "One who is wise is cautious and turns away from evil, but a fool is reckless and careless." I do not want to be a fool!

When Mary talks about the first hedge, I found the first bullet hard to take -"I will not go to bars, lounges or clubs" when I think about going to the bar I personally think about it as a place to hang out, and relax, not necessarily a place where you have to get drunk and find a person to hook up with......I don't think of a bar as inherently bad......and maybe I'm wrong when i think that......I will also say I have not spent much time in bars and maybe that is because it is not the greatest environment......hhmmm

When Mary talked about most of the hedges it reminded me of when Brian an I were dating and we had to follow my parents rules....only hanging out 4 times a wk..... we had to hang out in public places or have other people around.....it seemed liked the rules were never ending......although I found them to be burdensome at the time I am grateful for the rules as it simplified things in a way and made it easier to save ourselves for marriage. 

I just had not thought much about applying those same principles to life as a married person, like with men in the workplace. I will say in my current position I am put in situations where I am alone with men, and have to interact with men a lot. After reading this chapter I will have a new perspective on this and will pray about how to best handle these situations.

The bullet point  -"Unless there is another person present, I will keep conversations with men on a superficial level" stuck out to me.....I will say that sometimes my conversations have not always been superficial......I don't think they have been overly emotional and personal...I guess my issue is that I want to be friendly and nice to men, but at the same time I do not want to be sending the wrong message

Well overall I found the chapter hard to swallow, and believe that I can work on building up some of my hedges. I think I am kinda naive at times and only want to see the good in people and places.

I like the quote from the novel Don Quixote "No padlock, bolts, or bars can secure a maiden better than her own reserve" 

I pray that we may practice good discretion, always striving to protect our sexual purity and to help guard the sexual purity of those around us.